Accountability Stuart Brogden, June 2002
Being Alone is Dangerous
Prisons use solitary confinement as one of the harshest penalties allowed under our Constitution, short of execution. Some countries have used sensory deprivation chambers – the ultimate isolation - as a means of torture. Others use sensory deprivation chambers as a means to induce bizarre fantasies that would never be accepted by a sane person. Isolation makes a man vulnerable to, craving for stimuli – anything to relieve the emptiness of being alone.
Satan uses isolation to lead men astray. Examples: Judas, Samson, Peter (after the crucifixion), Elijah (after the victory over the prophets of Baal! 1 Kings 18:19-39). Each of these men knew the Lord and was defeated by being led away from the fellowship of God’s people into isolation. Satan even tempted Christ, who was led into the desert by the Holy Spirit to be isolated and tempted in every way as we might be tempted.
Proverbs 26:12 “Do you see a man wise in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”
Proverbs 26:27 “If a man digs a pit, he will fall into it; if a man rolls a stone, it will roll back on him.”
What’s a Guy to do?
God calls men out of isolation and into fellowship with Him and His church. God gives direction for living a life of freedom and meaning.
Colossians 2:13-14 “When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your sinful nature, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross.”
2 Corinthians 5:18 “all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation”
Galatians 5:13 “You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.”
A diamond is the hardest substance known to man. It’s formed under extreme pressure and heat - not comfortable, convenient circumstance. The value of a diamond is determined by four “Cs”: Cut, Color, Clarity, and Carat weight. Each diamond is examined for these four characteristics so its value can be determined. Note this: If a diamond doesn’t get exposed to heat and pressure, it won’t be a diamond – just a lump of coal.
A man’s character is revealed by five “Cs”, his
His life must be examined in these areas or he will likely have chosen the world, not Christ in one or more. Note this: If a man doesn’t get exposed to heat and pressure, he won’t mature into the godly man he is called to be!
Romans 5:3b-5 “we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”
Do you have a brother in Christ who has the freedom to ask you about these five key areas? To do so means putting yourself into circumstances that your flesh will resist – it’s not comfortable or convenient; it will require you to abandon your pride and face the truth. These five critical areas in each man’s life must face the heat and pressure of an accountable relationship if we are going to be conformed to the image of Christ rather than the world.
So often Christians seek out pagan counsel when they have debt, family, or career problems. God wrote the owner’s manual for human life. We who claim to know Him ought to consult Him first in all things – even worldly problems. A man pulling back from his routine, into isolation, is often sinking into an emotional and spiritual pit from which he will not escape easily nor on his own. You must be willing to take the risk of reaching out to such a brother, knowing he will suffer far more if you don’t.
We must be willing to ask for help and to offer it – unasked. This is the brotherhood of believers.
Luke 22:55-62 “But when they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and had sat down together, Peter sat down with them. A servant girl saw him seated there in the firelight. She looked closely at him and said, "This man was with him." But he denied it. "Woman, I don't know him," he said. A little later someone else saw him and said, "You also are one of them." "Man, I am not!" Peter replied. About an hour later another asserted, "Certainly this fellow was with him, for he is a Galilean." Peter replied, "Man, I don't know what you're talking about!" Just as he was speaking, the rooster crowed. The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word the Lord had spoken to him: "Before the rooster crows today, you will disown me three times." And he went outside and wept bitterly.”
Accountability from the Lord Himself in the form a loving yet firm glance that reminded Peter his accountability partner nailed him.
Over the next few years, Peter became a rock in Christ’s church.
The enemy tells us “if it feels good, do it”. The world tells us that life consists of stuff and circumstantial happiness. So often, it is far easier to choose the way of the world than it to follow Christ. Study a map that shows the path of a river. Water always seeks the lowest ground - the path of least resistance – drawn by the invisible force we call gravity, powerless to choose otherwise. Man often chooses the low ground, drawn by the invisible forces of his sinful nature and active work of Satan in our midst. But man can choose to focus on Christ and deny the flesh and walk the high ground – the path of righteousness.
Galaitans 5:16 “This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.”
The
path of least resistance makes both men and rivers crooked.
At the 1998 Promise Keepers conference in Houston, Texas (August 21&22) Gary Rosberg told a story about his accountability partner. Rosberg was in a depression. His father had recently passed away, he was withdrawn – not writing, not speaking, not working. It got to the point where he was not getting dressed or coming down from the bedroom in his home in Des Moines, Iowa.
His accountability partner, who lives in Fort Worth, Texas, noticed that Gary hadn’t called and hadn’t been seen in any of his normal circles; gave Gary a call. Gary told his friend that everything was fine and hung up.
The next morning, Gary’s wife, Barbara, answered the door to find Gary’s accountability partner – Steve Farrar, at their house. Barb insisted that Gary come downstairs without telling him who was there.
Gary said that when he went downstairs and saw Steve, he knew he was in trouble. Steve Farrar is about 4 inches taller and 75 pounds heavier than Gary Rosberg. Farrar poked Gary in the chest and said, “Tell me what’s going on. I’m not leaving until you come clean.”
Rosberg told us, “When my heart was weary, when my life was a wreck – God showed up with skin on. A friend who spoke the truth into my life.”
Do you have such a friend? Are you such a friend to another?
Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”
Proverbs 27:6 “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”
Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!”
Psalms 133:1 “Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!”
James 5:16 “confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
Proverbs 15:33 “The fear of the LORD is the instruction of wisdom; and before honor is humility.”
1 Peter 2:17 “Honor all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God.”