Doctrines determine deeds. John Korsgaard Nov 2002

At the wedding ceremony, among the likeliest things men said were these phrases: In sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse.

Now, what, may I ask is the better/worse about when finances and health have already been covered? Would it not be - or at least include - everything that goes into what is popularly called "relationships". And would that not include the most intimate of relationships?

If so, then...MEN, you made a promise before God and to God, that how your wife treats you and whether she understands your sexual needs (whether any wives really understand what drives us) has nothing to do with your fidelity.

I'm very visual.... I don’t feel guilty when I am tempted by beauty. God made me that way. I think, as a gender, we wish the other gender would deal more realistically with that factor. But how do I act towards such stimuli?

I can "fondle" the thought, play with it, nurture it. I can allow it residence. Or I can dismiss it - let it pass by. I can acknowledge it, recognize it and DECIDE to do nothing further with it. This decision is informed by unconditional promises made to God before my wife, a chaplain, our families and witnesses.

Secondly, Romans One indicates that, in the large picture, sexual sin comes on from a root of unthankfulness. Are you thankful for the wife you were given?

For some that, quite honestly, IS a tough question. If you are more frustrated by her than anything else, than the question...the same question...gets rephrased...to: Do you know, better than God, what you deserved? Or what is best for you? Do you know how your dilemma fits into the big picture of eternity? He does. He’s orchestrating it.

Thirdly, the Decalogue was a code for Israel and applies to Christians today as revelation of God's character rather than legalisms. Still, it is noteworthy that Thou shall not covet another man's wife COMES AFTER the issue of adultery has already been handled.

In other words, the problem with coveting is not what you covet, it is the slap in God's face when you are dissatisfied with how He has seen fit to distribute.

To summarize, if you keep your promises (vows), know you should be content with God's providence and even thankfully not question His wisdom, all the biological impulses become irrelevant. I didn't say they won't plague you, I said the very plaguing is irrelevant to the question of action.

In any arena, Christians who say, "I can't help it" DON'T GET IT.

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